Learning To Forget
by afaithfulwriter890
Summary: It's been a while since Esme was killed saving Luna from a pack of vicious newborns. Carlisle has grown closer to Luna and their relationship finally might be taken to the next level... CarlisleXOC fanfic. M for LEMONS!


I was waiting for Carlisle to return home that night. I sat in the Cullen living room listening to another one of Emmett's stories while my ears were alert waiting to hear Carlisle's car pull up in the driveway. Tonight I would ask him.

"And then this huge mother grizzly came running out of nowhere and tried to attack me, but I jumped up over it and landed on its back!" Emmett exaggerated like he always did. Jasper was just shaking his head and watching TV with Alice while Edward and Bella sat on the loveseat with Renesmee in their laps. She was sprawled out like a little queen, yawning and waiting to kiss her grandfather goodnight so she could go to bed.

Emmett was in the middle of telling me who he snapped the bear's neck when I heard Carlisle's car pull up in the driveway. I looked at Emmett who was oblivious, then tried to focus on the TV. Edward was looking at me, his eyes slightly narrowed. I knew that he blamed me for Esme's death in some ways. He knew that what I was planning tonight and I knew it wouldn't please him.

Carlisle walked up the steps and entered his house. His scent whooshed in and swirled around me, almost caressing me. I rose form my seat on the couch and turned to face him. "Welcome home, Carlisle," I said with a kind smile.

He smiled back and me and came over. He kissed my forehead politely—always trying to be a perfect gentleman—then turned toward Renesmee who was now chanting his name and hugging his leg. Carlisle leaned down and hugged Renesmee gently then scolded her lightly for not being in bed at this late hour even though it was only nine thirty. While he wasn't looking, I fixed my denim jacket so more of my bra showed. I was wearing short jean shorts that came all the way up to my butt in an effort to get Carlisle all riled up. I shot a glance at his crotch—nothing. i_Dammit._/i

Once Carlisle was home and Emmett was distracted, Alice and Jasper jumped up and darted upstairs—whether they were eager to get in bed, or were eager to get away from Emmett I was unsure of. Edward and Bella waited patiently as Renesmee held her hand to Carlisle's cheek and "showed" him all about her day. When Renesmee was done, Carlisle smiled and gave her a few words of advice on how to handle Jacob when he beats her again at Checkers, then kissed her head and set her down. She ran to her parents and Bella picked up her exhausted child and carried her out the door with Edward close behind.

Carlisle and I were alone now. I looked at him, but he was still watching Renesmee waving to him as she looked over Bella's shoulder. Carlisle waved back. He was so sweet with little kids. I wondered what he was thinking, but didn't want to read his mind—he deserved privacy.

"So, how was your day," I asked casually, taking his hand.

"Fine," he said non-enthusiastically. "I lost a patient today…" I felt bad for him, he always found some way to blame himself when he lost a patient, mainly because he knew he had the power to save every human that died… or maybe it was because he wished he could die too… I shuddered inwardly at the thought. I couldn't bear to even imagine Carlisle in a coffin…

"I'm sorry," I whispered back, and turned toward him. He turned toward me as well and looked into my eyes, then looked down. "What is it?" I asked.

"You… you remind me of Esme sometimes is all," he said. "Are we betraying her by… by… by being… friends?" he asked.

It felt like my heart had just shattered. "Friends…" I whispered. "No I doubt she'd mind friends." My plan was ruined. How could I even ask Carlisle to sleep with me if he considered me just a friend?

"Well… friends is a bit of an understatement," he allowed.

My eyes flew from the ground to his face. I smiled. There was still hope. He smiled back and me and moved a little closer. My body felt like it was trembling in anticipation. Maybe I wouldn't have to ask him to touch me. His lips were inches away from my face. He still hadn't kissed me on the lips yet. He hesitated for a brief moment, then placed his lips on mine.

His lips tasted like cherries surprisingly and he smelled like a delicious scent of men's cologne. The next thing I knew, his strong, muscular arms tightened around my waist and pulled me to him. I tried not to gasp in excitement as I reached up and locked my arms around his neck while running one hand through his blond hair. He let out a soft groan and kissed me deeper, pulling me closer still so that my body was pressed up against his. "Do you want to?" I asked between his lips.

"Want to what?" he replied, moving his lips away from mine and along my jawline.

I frowned. Was he really that clueless? I loved him, but I thought he would have figured it out by now. "Have… well… you know… well… you know," I decided to leave it at that, not wanting to be too straightforward. I could almost hear the click in his head as he figured it out.

He pulled away and looked into my eyes again. I wonder what he saw, a loving face that wanted nothing more than to be with him forever or the soulless monster I truly was. He searched my face for a long moment, before looking down at how close we were. I gripped him like he was my lifeline, not wanting to let him go. I had never been so close to him and I don't know what I'd do if I had to give him up.

"Do… do you want to?" he asked, looking at my face, then glancing down at the my slightly exposed bra and boobs.

I nodded. "Yes, Carlisle. Yes I do… I was going to ask you about it tonight, but then… then this happened," I told him with a small smile. "Esme… Esme would want you to move on… She'd want you to be happy," I encouraged him, trying to make him feel better and not guilty.

Carlisle looked away at the wall then just hugged me tightly for a long moment. "Oh, Luna…" he whispered… "God, I want you so badly right now."

That sent a shockwave of excited pleasure through my body. "Take me then," I replied in his ear. I tried to climb onto him—hitch my legs around his hips to hold myself to him.

He seemed to give in and helped me, pulling me up by my butt one hand wandering closer to the apex of my legs while the other rubbed my butt affectionately. I let out a small moan as his hands reached my middle of my legs. He pressed his thumb right where my clit would be if I weren't wearing anything and began to rub in circular motions. I moaned louder now. "Room…" I whispered barely able to keep my voice steady.

Carlisle didn't need to be told twice. Without stopping his circular rubs or his kisses, he darted up the stairs with me in his arms and took me to his bedroom. He then moved his one hand away from my butt and locked the door. It was then I slid down and watched him, waiting for him to turn around.

When he faced me, I started to take off my denim jacket. He watched me, his eyes raking my voluptuous figure as if he had x-ray vision. When my jacket came off, revealing my bra, he growled in a low guttural way that made me so wet for him. "Take it off," he said darkly. This new Carlisle I had never seen before both frightened me and turned me on further. I wasn't sure whether I should run or throw myself on him.

I unhooked my bra in the back and let it slide forward, exposing my boobs. Carlisle moved forward and ran his knuckles gently along one, making me shiver. I had never been with a man like this before, and I was thrilled that it was Carlisle I was with. The fact that it was him in the room, him pleasuring me, and he wanting me just made it all so more wonderful, but at the same time mind-boggling. How could a man as perfect as he love a creature like me—an oddity of the vampire world?

At this thought, I looked down, feeling like I wasn't good enough. This knew, dark Carlisle immediately disappeared as he cupped my cheek in his hand. "What's wrong, my darling?"

I refused to meet his eyes, my stomach twisting itself into a guilty knot. Not only did I suddenly feel not good enough, but I also felt bad for almost asking him for this. "Carlisle… why do you love me? It doesn't make sense… Not for someone as beautiful and perfect as you to love a freak like me… I'm not good enough…"

Carlisle stared at me, looking genuinely confused. "Not good enough? I honestly believe that you've confused myself with you. How that's possible, I don't know, but you are absolutely wrong if you even entertain the notion that you're not good enough for me. You are the most beautiful, most wonderful, prettiest, happiest, greatest person I've ever met," he told me with a small smile.

"Besides Esme," I whispered sadly.

He looked like I'd just punched him in the stomach. He looked down. "Luna… don't do this… You know I feel bad enough about this…"

"I just want to know," I replied, studying his face. "Do you… want me because you love me, or do you want me because… because you miss Esme and I remind you of her? Or is it because you haven't had sex in so long that you'll just take what you can get?" I asked, my voice cracking.

Carlisle frowned. "Luna, I'm deeply insulted that you would think that of me. Luna, I love you for you, not because you remind me of Esme! You are a beautiful, wonderful, kind woman that was always by my side during my trying times… Do you know how much you mean to me for that alone? I love you, Luna."

I watched him. I wanted it to be true, but I remembered the ways he looked at Esme and took her upstairs every night. There was no way he could say he loved me more. "Carlisle…"

"Shh," he whispered. "I'll show you how much you mean to me."

He pressed his lips to my own once more and locked his arms around my waist, one hand wandering down and rubbing my ass affectionately. I tried to forget about Esme and locked my arms around his neck, pulling him close. I jumped onto him again and wrapped my legs around his waist. I could feel that he was already excited and ready for me. It made me tremble with excited anticipation.

Carlisle walked me over to the bed and set me down once more before unbuttoning his shirt. I watched in awe as the gorgeously-sculpted plains of his chest were revealed. He slipped if off and let if fall to the floor, then did the same with his shoes. I was unsure whether I should watch or not as he unbuttoned, and then unzipped his pants. It ignited a fire inside me that sent a shockwave of pleasure through me. Good God, I wanted this man so badly.

He must have noticed my sudden arousal. He pulled his pants down around his ankles, letting his already erect member spring further out of its confinement. God, it looked huge with the boxers on! He looked at my face almost as if he were worried, then yanked his boxers down around his ankles with his pants. It was huge as I had always imagined. He was like a god—perfectly sculpted on the bottom as well as the top… His face alone was so enthralling, but his bare body before was almost too much.

I was staring and I knew it. Carlisle chuckled and moved toward me slowly. He cupped my breasts in both his hands. "You're beautiful, and I haven't even seen all of you, yet."

He moved closer and guided me further onto the bed so I was on my back. My breathing became labored as his hands ran down my stomach closer toward my waist. "Carlisle… I need to tell you something."

His eyes flew to mine, obviously worried that I was in pain, or I was backing out. "Anything," he said.

"I… I'm still a virgin," I murmured quietly, almost ashamed.

Carlisle just smiled. "I had guessed so," he said. "I'm afraid it might be a bit painful for you at first, then."

I let out an uneasy laugh, and then gulped, but I trusted Carlisle and knew that he would try to make it as least painful as he could for me. Even when he was in this animalistic, wanting state, he was the most controlled vampire and man I've ever known.

"Shh," Carlisle soothed as his hands reached the button of my shorts. He undid the button, and then unzipped the zipper. I shivered as he pulled my shorts down around my ankles then raised my legs up and slipped them off. I waited anxiously for him to do the same with my panties, but he didn't at first. Instead he ran his fingers along what would be my entrance without the underwear on. I moaned and reached to take them off myself, but Carlisle beat me too it. He ripped them off in his haste, then looked up at me and then down again, embarrassed. "Sorry."

"Don't be, just… keep… going…" I breathed, guiding his fingers inside my vagina. I groaned as he took over and continued to thrust his fingers in and out of me, adding a few each time until most of them were going in. He stopped after a while and stroked my inner walls with his forefinger before pulling out.

I whimpered, but he just smiled and moved closer until he hovered over me. He watched my face and kissed my lips softly. "I love you," he whispered. "And I'm sorry." He began to enter me. I winced as he proceeded further inside me. I tried to convince myself that the pain was the pleasure, but it i_did_/i hurt and I was on the verge of tears. I pulled Carlisle's head down so it was buried in my shoulder and he couldn't see as one tear overflowed from my eye and trickled down my cheek.

Carlisle seemed to know—maybe he smelled the salt, and reached up with his thumb and wiped it away, murmuring more apologies. When he was fully sheathed, I seemed to relax. He waited patiently as the pain subsided. Finally I let him go and looked at his concerned face. "Okay…" I whispered. "I'm okay."

He nodded and began to thrust in and out, slowly at first as if he feared that this would continue to hurt me, but it didn't. It did almost everything but hurt me. I loved the friction he made with every movement he made, and all the kisses and soft words of encouragement he gave and murmured. He shifted in position to get at a better angle to hit that sweet-spot inside me every time. I groaned and wrapped my arms up and around his neck, pulling on his golden locks. If this hurt him, he didn't complain. He just moved faster—his thrusts getting more fervent and erratic.

It wasn't long after that that I couldn't hold it any longer. I gave in and screamed his name in pleasure as the orgasm began. Carlisle growled in pleasure to hear his name being screamed and as I climaxed and allowing my fluids to flow around his still swollen cock. He continued his movements as I rode out the orgasm until he too released, his vampire seed coursing inside me.

Carlisle lay down on top of me and rested his head on my chest. "Do you believe I love you now?"

I had to giggle a little. "I never said you didn't… I know you'll always love Esme… If she came back… would you choose her over me?"

Carlisle remained silent for a moment. "No," he whispered finally. "I want you."

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><p>AN: This is just a random point commission I did on deviantART. Yes, you can find me there as well writing these stories. I thought it would be interesting since I know people love a good lemon... Not that this is good, but you know what I mean. I don't expect this to get many reviews. I won't be continuing it, it's just a one-shot. Luna is an OC and is not my character so I claim no rights to her or to the lovely Carlisle and his family. :) R & R please though!


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